Confessions of a Loveaholic...

Tonight, God gave me the biggest (and the hardest) commandment - "Michelle, obey Me." And with this obedience came the pre-requisite of trust. My conversations with Him are a pattern of apologies and assurances and then pleas. He keeps on saying how sorry He is for letting me go through this NOW. And I kept on telling Him not to be too harsh on me. Over and over. I can feel his mercy for the pain the world has inflicted on me. But at the same time,  He knows I need to experience this.  It is as if He has foreseen this, but it was I who brought this to my self. He placed enough sign boards along the way saying I should follow the U-turn back to His plans. Hard-headed, I said, "Dont worry Father. This is only a detour. You'll see. I'll get what I want. You'll get what You want from me. It's a win-win! See?" It was too late to turn around this time.  I have fallen off a cliff. And I didnt let go. I kept on holding on to every solid ground my fi...

She whispers to him… I want to be so close you can feel me breathe I want to keep looking at you while the anticipation builds I want to not be able to stand it anymore I want to have to you ….no matter where we are I want to you to press em against a wall and pull my panties aside I want to hear you inhale with that little ‘oh’ sound you make I want our tongues to collide I want to taste you I want you...then I wake up and reality hits...you aren't mine and I am not yours.... it was all dream... Dreams are a sweet escape from the reality we face daily...  In dreams we are set free to be whomever we can conjure up...  

In and Out of Time by Maya Angelou The sun has come The mists have gone We see in the distance our long way home I was always yours to have You were always mine We have loved each other in and out of time When the first stone looked up at the blazing sun And the first tree struggled up from the forest floor I have always loved you more You freed your braids, gave your hair to the breeze It hung like a hive of honey bees I reached in the mass for the sweet honeycomb there God, how I loved your hair You saw me bludgeoned by circumstance Lost, injured, hurt by chance I screamed to the heavens Loudly screamed Trying to change our nightmares into dreams The sun has come The mists have gone We see in the distance our long home I was always yours to have You were always mine We loved each other in and out, in and out, in and out of time

Do something that you are afraid of.  Start something you have always wanted to try.  Look out of the window and wait for guidance.  Take a personality test and see how well it matches what you think of yourself.  Write down things that you notice about yourself.  Do the thing that makes you lose track of time.  Listen to praise about yourself.  Listen to criticism about yourself.  Meditate.  Be idle for a while.  Analyze your dreams.  Create something.  Think of the thing you most want to give to others.  Listen.  Take a walk.  Spend time in nature.  Smile, then think of all the things you have.  Smile, then think of all the things you desire.  Feel all of your emotions.  Be honest with yourself.  Purposely take on a challenge.  Accidentally take on a challenge.  Live with uncertainty.  Accept who you are.  Make self improvements.  Become...